The Spy
by Glaurung II
Summary: A hidden camera is a dangerous tool in the hands of three girls that are too curious for their own sake. Beware of crazy ideas, OCCness, inconsistencies with the timeline of the story, made-up kinships and SPOILERS! Slight YaagxLightning


**DISCLAIMER:** All characters here belong to Square-Enix.

**AN:** This is an idea that hit me when I saw that Galenth Dysley spied on the group in the game through his mechanical owl, Minerva. What if he also watched his underlings to be sure that they didn't do anything suspicious? Also, I felt that some characters deserved a little more love and exposure. Beware of crazy ideas, OCCness, inconsistencies with the timeline of the story, made-up kinships and GREAT SPOILERS!!! So read at your own risk. You have been warned.

**AN2:** Just for your information, I do not support/encourage voyeurism or spying on others. That's WRONG and only funny or useful as a resource under certain conditions. Respect other's intimacy as you'd like yours to be respected, kids. Ok? Ok. Soooooooo, on with the show!

**xxxxXX-0-XXxxxx**

_On__ the Lindblum Airship._

"I got it! I got it!" Vanille screamed like crazy as she bounced into the girls' room.

Both Lightning and Fang watched her in silence, knowing that trying to talk to her in that state was useless. It was better to wait until she got tired (which could take a long time), or until she finally revealed what got her so thrilled.

"Hope gave me the codes!" she said at last, flailing a piece of paper in front of them.

"Codes?" Lightning exclaimed. "For what?"

"Hope said his papa works for the Sanctum communication system, and that Mr. Dysley likes to spy on his subordinates. He knows because he once broke into that channel and…"

"W-wait, _spying_?" Lightning interrupted, baffled. Fang, on the other hand, was more used to Vanille's antics to say anything and just chuckled silently.

"Yes," the other girl nodded vehemently. "He set up some cameras in their houses to watch what they are doing and Hope gave me the codes for each one of them and…"

"And we are not going to watch them," Lightning said sternly, snatching the paper out of the other girl's hands. "Don't you know that spying on people is wrong?"

The pink haired girl ignored Vanille's pout. Just as she made a motion to tear the paper, Fang snatched it from her hands, holding it up so the other couldn't reach it.

"Hey!"

"I say that we should watch them. Who knows? We could even blackmail them," the brunette said with an impish smirk.

"Blackmail?" Lightning yelled. "Are you insane or what? They already want us dead! Give it back!"

Cursing her shorter stature, Lightning hopped, trying to snatch the paper from Fang's hand, who only laughed and kept her at bay, something that infuriated the other even more. During their brief struggle, Lightning got Fang against the wall and grabbed the arm the brunette had raised, while the taller girl grabbed Lightning's free wrist, still laughing. Vanille didn't know whether to laugh or to cheer her friend, but watching Lightning like that was funnier than anything.

At that moment the door swished open and Rygdea walked in, making the struggling pair freeze as they were.

"Excuse me girls, the boss says tomorrow we'll arrive at…" Rygdea also froze, wide eyed. "Whoa! What the…?"

"They are struggling," Vanille chirped innocently, with her hands behind her back.

Fang had lowered the hand on which she had the paper clutched, but still with her arm extended and still grabbing Lightning to keep her at bay. Neither of them became aware of why Rygdea blushed so deeply or why he smirked.

"Struggling, uh? Didn't know you were into catfights."

"What!?" Lightning yelled, her cheeks turning red. Fang had released her, both forgetting altogether what had started the argument in the first place.

"What's a catfight?" the brunette inquired.

The captain watched Lightning whispering the explanation to Fang while Vanille tried his best to hear it too. Rygdea was bathed in cold sweat when two pairs of green eyes flashed at him in anger. He could easily deflect Fang's attacks since she lacked any military training, no matter how fierce or determined the girl was. But teamed up with Lightning, who WAS a soldier… He could try taming the wild thing that Fang was, but fighting against two furious lionesses was another story.

"I-I… uh…" he babbled as he staggered backwards, trying to keep enough distance between his person and the two green eyed she-demons in front of him.

"I'll have your guts for garters…" Fang hissed.

"It-it was just a joke!" Rygdea said desperately, waving his hands before him. He really didn't want to know how bad the two of them could be. "Gotta go, see ya!"

And he ran away, almost running into the door before it opened.

"Wow, you sure scared him shitless!" Vanille giggled.

"I know," the other shrugged. "Ryg knows he shouldn't piss me off. So, shall we watch it or not?"

By now Lightning had already surrendered to the fact that, unless she wore stilettos, she wouldn't be able to reach anything that Fang held over her head. She felt a deep sense of foreboding overcoming her.

"Why do I think I'm going to regret this?" she said.

"C'mon!" Vanille exclaimed, slapping her shoulder. "Aren't you thrilled?"

"She's scared," Fang teased. "Poor little soldier, who wants to chicken out."

Lightning threw her a dirty glance before snatching the paper out of her hands and seating in front of the computer. Fang winked at Vanille. A little persuasion was in order, since the pink haired girl was the only one who could understand a computer and use it.

The ex-soldier followed the written instructions and a window popped on the screen, asking for the necessary code. There she paused.

"Ok, who's first?" she said, glancing at the list.

"Nabaat," Vanille said.

"Who's her?" Fang asked.

"She's a horrible woman!" Vanille exclaimed. "She kidnapped Sazh's son and, and…"

"She's lieutenant colonel of PSICOM," Lightning said. "She outranks Rosch."

"Who's Rosch?" Vanille asked this time.

"It doesn't matter," Fang interrupted, strangely disappointed. "He's dead anyway."

"He's not," Lightning said. "I saw him limping inside Hope's home while we were boarding with Rygdea."

"But they shot him!"

"Seems like they missed. Either that or he has nine lives," the pink haired girl shrugged. "Nabaat first, wasn't it?"

And she inserted the code for Jihl Nabaat's home. Another window appeared and a video began to play. Lightning sighed, Vanille blushed and Fang chuckled quietly. The camera was set inside Jihl's bedroom.

"Dirty old man…" Lightning muttered.

The blonde entered the scene; surely the record took place after the woman arrived at home from work.

And she began to undress.

"Oh, please!" Lightning exclaimed. "That Dysley is a voyeur!"

Lightning closed her eyes out of sheer embarrassment for the woman. Not that Jihl was her cup of tea, but she liked to respect other's intimacy. However, she opened her eyes again when Vanille burst into a maniacal laugh.

"They are faaaaaake! I kneeeeeeeeeeew it!" she screamed in triumph, bouncing up and down and clapping her hands.

Fang also laughed, but less hysterically.

Lightning stared at the image, as a faint sense of triumph mingled with disbelief began to creep over her. When she was serving in the army there had been many of her male colleagues who praised Nabaat's beauty and attributes. Not that she cared, since she thought that most of her companions were either self-conceited dorks or plainly stupid. What really irked her was how their judgment about women was always based on the size of the breasts. Knowing that the only reason for praising among the troops was a trick made out of sheer vanity and shallowness made her laugh.

"I thought they were just a bit too pushed up," she thought aloud with a smirk.

"Seems they aren't," Fang said, still laughing. "Say, Vanille, why are you so happy?"

The girl stopped all of a sudden and looked as if she was going to cry. The change was so abrupt that Lightning feared that there was something wrong with her.

"When they captured us, she… she… she…" she sobbed, and the other girls held their breath out of pure apprehension. "She called me a brat and said that I would never be called a woman because mine were too small!"

And she broke down in sobs.

Lightning facepalmed.

"Ooooh, don't cry, Vanille. There, there," Fang cooed as she embraced the younger girl and softly patted her back. Boy, she could be quite the mama bear when it concerned Vanille. "Size doesn't matter and, besides, hers are smaller than yours, right?"

"Y-yes," Vanille half laughed, half sobbed, wiping away her tears. "Let's see the rest of them!"

"Are you sure?" Lightning asked, reading again the paper. "Nabaat is the only woman. The rest are men."

"Who cares?" said Fang. "Just input the next code!"

The next code was for Raines' home. It was a luminous and ample house, but there was a family already living there.

"Is Raines married?" Lightning asked.

"I wonder," Fang mused and then she exclaimed: "Oh, now I remember! He doesn't live in Eden, but here on the Lindblum!"

"Um, maybe he knew he was being spied on?" Vanille wondered.

"His rank is high enough to know what's going on," Lightning said, crossing her arms over her chest. "And knowing how he thinks about the Sanctum, it wouldn't surprise me if he was more cautious than your average officer. He must have sold his home and moved here, where he would face less probabilities of being spied on."

"Good thing we have a real soldier among us," Fang teased.

Lightning had to suppress the smirk that tugged at the corner of her lips.

"All right! Who's next?" Vanille asked eagerly. It was like having a child in a toy shop.

The next one was for Rosch's home. Lightning really didn't want to see him. If Serah hadn't been marked as a l'Cie, Lighting would have been promoted to captain in a matter of months. Sergeant Major Amodar always joked about it.

"_I don't know, sergeant,"_ he used to say. _"Maybe you will end up being Lieutenant Colonel Rosch's personal guard."_

"_But I'm just a sergeant,"_ she often replied, and his answer was always the same:

"_Your progression is formidable. You are only twenty! And they say he has a keen eye for spotting good soldiers to take them under his __wing and train them personally."_

A hand on her shoulder woke her up.

"Yo, Lightning!" Fang said. "Is something wrong? You zoned out."

"Oh, sorry," she said, blushing lightly and typing the combination of numbers and letter.

To her relief, the camera was set this time on the living-room. No embarrassing strip offs this time.

"Awww, there's nothing," Vanille pouted.

"Odd," Fang said. "I thought a high rank officer would have a bigger home."

"_True enough,"_ Lightning thought. She herself always envisioned high ranks living on spacious houses like Raines', but Rosch's was quite small. From the look of it, it seemed like there was only a bedroom, a bathroom, a living-room and a small kitchen, separated from the last just by a counter. It looked more like a bachelor flat than anything. _"Thinking about it, that's what it really is."_

A white, fluffy cat dozed on the kitchen counter, moving contentedly its tail, and a rumor could be heard in the background. Lightning thought it was just noise from the transmission, but just then the videophone rang, making the cat look up lazily. It was connected to the television screen instead of the standard little one, and Lightning could read the name of the caller.

"_Rygdea?"_

The rumor stopped a few moments while the phone still rang, and a door opened.

"Oh, please, no!" Lightning closed her eyes out of sheer embarrassment for the second time that day.

"A-ha!" Fang exclaimed. "Now that's what I call a nice view!"

Lightning opened her eyes, trying to ignore Vanille's muffled giggling and how her own cheeks burned.

Is wasn't like Rosch was THAT handsome, or at least that was the litany her mind repeated over and over to keep her from dying out of mortification, but the man could surely cover himself a bit more, even in his own home. He had come out of the bathroom after having taken a shower, still toweling his bluish hair; the other towel he had hastily wrapped around him was below his navel and almost as short as her mini-skirt, fully covering his privates, but leaving a clear hint of what laid beneath the cloth as it parted right over his left thigh with each step he took.

"Wow, look at THAT!" Fang said.

"Have you no shame at all?" Lightning scolded.

"Shame? What's that?" the brunette smirked.

The pink-haired girl rolled her eyes, but she had to admit that he was attractive. Not as bulky as Snow, but he had the trained body of a soldier and, now that she noticed it, his slightly tanned skin made a nice contrast with the white towels and his silver-blue hair. She shook her head after surprising herself staring at his torso and the place where the line of his abdominals disappeared beneath the towel.

Rosch stared a moment at the screen and then answered the call. The same Rygdea they knew appeared at the other side of the line.

"_Yo, Yaag, 'sup?"_ was the plain salute of the captain. Lightning knew he had no soldier manners, but those words made her shake her head.

"_Hi, cousin! You caught me __in the shower," _a soft smile broke his normally stern expression.

"Cousin? Wait… what?"

"_Are you comin' tomorrow to the match?"_ Rygdea asked with a smirk.

"_Sorry, I have work to do,"_ Rosch apologized as he sat on a stool by the counter, his head towel now around his shoulders. Lightning noticed how wild his hair really was. He surely used a good amount of gel every day just to keep his bangs that straight. Looking closely, he sported a shorter version of Fang's hairstyle, wild curls and all, and it didn't matter how much he tried to tame them with his fingers, they never straightened.

Why was she thinking that he looked outrageously hot? She never thought those things about men. In fact, she had forced herself to lose any interest in men whatsoever, for they could distract her from her objectives (namely, acting like a mamma bear with her little sis).

"_Aww, c'mon, don't tell me that bitch is sending you again on a suicidal mission!"_

The cat stood up and approached its owner with the tail upraised and mewling softly. Rosch smiled at the animal and picked it up, cradling it on his arms and rubbing its belly. The cat seemed quite pleased with that, a sign of two things: His skin was completely dry by now and still it must have been quite warm from the shower. She felt her cheeks raising another hundred degrees at the thought.

"_It's not a suicidal mission,"_ Rosch protested, and his face darkened. _"You know the l'Cie that appeared some days ago?"_

"_Yeah, the one__ that appeared in Bowdam, right?"_

"_He's only a kid of six__."_

"_Wha-? Are you shitting me?"_ Rygdea's shock was more than evident. _"Why?"_

"That's Dajh," Vanille's murmured. "That record must be from many days ago."

"_They are keeping him inside the medical facilities__, all alone. He keeps asking for his father, but Nabaat ordered that the boy must be isolated from his family."_

"_So that's where you are going, right?"_

"_Nabbat insists that it's not my duty as a high rank officer to babysit a child,"_ he smirked. _"But I don't care what she says on the matter. Not this time."_

"_Yep, you are quite the rebel,"_ Rygdea's sarcasm could be cut with a knife.

"_Shut up, you are lucky you have Raines as your superior!"_

"_Then __come to the Cavalry, man! You are one of the best pilots I know. I don't know what the hell got into you to enter PSICOM in the first place."_

"_You know I can't," _Rosch's face darkened again._ "I can't avoid what Nabaat does, but I can ease it, if only a bit. Who will do it if I'm not around?"_

"_You take too much shit on your shoulders, cousin," _Rygdea frowned. _"I mean, soldiers adore you and all but… man, think about yourself for a bit. When was the last time you had a date? Back at the Academy? That was almost ten years ago! At this rate your hair won't be the only blue part in your body if the only one you pamper so much is that fur ball."_

"_It's not m__y fault if the only kind of woman that approaches me is the gold-digger type. And this _fur ball_ is a better company than most humans."_

"_Yep, I forgot. You are a hotshot, after all,"_ Rygdea scratched the back of his head._ "Ok, I promise I'll find you a nice date, ok?"_

"_Cousin, no blind dates,"_ Rosch warned. _"You know I always disappoint them."_

"_You do so on purpose," _Lightning could swear she saw Rygdea pouting. _"You never told me what kind of girl you like, and I can't help much if you don't spill any info."_

"_Why so interested on that all of a sudden?"_ Rosch rolled his eyes before his cousin's pout. _"I told you ages ago."_

"_Nope, you didn't,"_ Rygdea leaned on his hands, a roguish look on his blue eyes_. "You should tell your favorite cousin about this kind of things so he can help out, you know?"_

"_What do you want me to say?"_ Rosch sighed.

"_Hair color?"_

"_I don't know."_

"_Yaag…"_ Rygdea used that threatening tone all mothers have.

"_No, really, I don't care for hair or eye color. I… uh…" _Rosch scratched the back of his head, and a faint blush appeared on his cheeks. He seemed very reserved concerning his feelings. _"I… I'd like a responsible woman who is somewhat mysterious, silent and acts strong but actually is very tender and fragile and needs to be protected and cared for…"_

Rygdea busted out laughing.

"_Oh, my!"_ he guffawed_. "Really, Yaag, I never thought you were such a romantic."_

"_What's so funny about it?"_ it was Rosch's turn to pout.

"_Nothing, nothing! But you are so__ serious-looking that I doubt anyone would guess that you have such a tender core. Anyway, I think it would be a pleasant surprise for any lady. Ok, I'll see what I can do, see ya!"_

Rygdea cut out and the screen faded to black. Rosch sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose with his free hand (the other was occupied with his cat). Then he let the animal go and stood up. The cat protested loudly at his.

_"I have to dress up,"_ Rosch chuckled as he toweled his hair again. _"Don't be so impatient!"_

He turned around towards the bathroom, but his cat didn't agree with the deal. Lightning had never dealt directly with cats before but, in the split second after Rosch turned away, she saw the cat's back tense and the tail stiffen, and she knew that the animal was plotting something.

The cat jumped, hooking up its sharp nails on the towel Rosch wore so loosely around his waist, snatching it and running towards the camera.

Rosch yelped, turning around.

Fang gasped and quickly covered Vanille's eyes.

Lightning covered her mouth and then fumbled nervously with the touchpad to close the window.

But not before the two of them had seen more than they would have ever hoped to see.

"Why did you cover my eyes?" Vanille exclaimed, bating Fang's hand away.

"Because you are too young to see such things," the other sternly said.

"Nothing was shown," Lightning sentenced, getting up the chair without looking at them, but both girls could see that her ears were of a ruby color.

"Y-yeah, it was a false alarm," Fang caught Lighting's hint. "I covered your eyes just in case."

"Oh," Vanille looked strangely disappointed, but she cocked her head to one side as she kept asking innocently. "Then, why Lightning is so red? It clashes with her pink hair."

Lightning though that, sometimes, Vanille's naiveté was utterly annoying. She chose to ignore her obvious comment.

"See? I was right," she said, turning around and looking as stern as she could, crossing her arms over her chest to hide the fact that her hands were trembling. "We learnt nothing useful from it. Now I-I think I'll go to the mess hall for a cold drink."

She went to the door, throwing another dirty glance to Fang, who was holding back quite badly a fit of laugher. It was ironic how, no matter how many enemies she could sweep the floor with, she had felt clumsy and awkward like a little girl moments ago.

Fang threw an arm around her shoulders, now laughing openly.

"Aw, don't be so timid! It was nothing you weren't bound to see some day, right?" and she lowered her voice to a whisper. "I think that instead of a saber he should wield a spear. At least girls would be aware of what's coming on them."

Lightning shoved the other girl away with a grunt, feeling even more embarrassed when a part of her brain agreed with Fang. She punched violently the control panel and the door swished open. She had to jump aside not to be swept along by a strange and huge bundle which fell forward rather heavily and noisily.

"Well, well, well," Fang said, sauntering to the moving bundle or, more accurately, the four adult males heaped on the floor. "What do we have here?"

They quickly got up and brushed themselves, trying to keep some of their dignity. Vanille's muffled giggle could be heard as a background.

"Were you eavesdropping?" Lightning asked in a low, dangerous voice, all her embarrassment forgotten and replaced with murderous intend.

Snow, Sazh, Rygdea and Cid looked at each other.

"I… uh…" Snow began, scratching the back of his head. "Rygdea told us you were having some difficulties, big sis, uh… so, we, uh…"

"We came at once to see if we could help," Cid intervened, calm and collected once more.

"Yeah, that's right," Sazh quickly said. "You know, Rygdea told us you might need help and…"

The Chocobo chick popped out of his afro and began hopping, using his hair as an elastic bed.

"Catfight, catfight!" it squeaked. "Wheee, hot chicks! Catfight!"

The four men felt at once how their blood ran cold all of a sudden.

There was a heavy silence on the room.

"I-I-I-It's not what you think!" Rygdea babbled.

Fang punched the control panel and closed the door.

"So… you want to see girls fighting, uh?" she asked them with a vicious smirk.

"Let's offer them a good show, shall we?" Lightning added with the same smirk, crunching her knuckles.

**xxxxXX-0-XXxxxx**

**END OF ONESHOT!**

If you want to see Yaag in all his toweled glory, go to my DeviantArt account. The link is on my userpage!


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